


I'm Sweating Bullets Like a Modern Romeo

by shitmichael



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: Aftercare, Bottom Calum, Fluff, Humiliation, Light Dom/sub, M/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Praise Kink, Punishment, Scratching, Sex Toys, Smut, Spanking, Top Michael, Vibrators, malum, michael washes cals hair
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-21
Updated: 2016-08-21
Packaged: 2018-08-10 05:37:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,013
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7832443
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shitmichael/pseuds/shitmichael
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"You're getting punished tonight," was all he said in a casual voice before leading them out of the hotel lobby.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm Sweating Bullets Like a Modern Romeo

**Author's Note:**

> title is from bang bang by green day

Michael was jiggling his foot nervously while he waited in the hotel lobby for Calum to show up. He was already twenty minutes late, and the denim meme on Tumblr could only distract him so much. Sure, he and Calum had been dating for almost two years now, but what's to say he didn't finally come to his senses and realize who exactly it was that he called his boyfriend.

Needless to say, Michael was shitting himself. How would he be able to stay in the band if Calum broke up with him? He didn't want to give up his dream, but he wasn't sure how he'd be able to keep writing love songs with his ex. How would their stage dynamic be affected? Would they have to strategically plan going to catering to avoid each other?

Thankfully, Calum decided at that point to finally make an appearance, right when Michael was debating whether or not to go to his hotel room to make sure that Calum remembered the date that they had planned weeks prior.

Michael's breath hitched in his throat when he saw how beautiful Calum looked. He was wearing his usual skinny jeans and a cut off Drop Dead shirt that showed off his arms perfectly. How did Michael get this lucky? He locked his phone before standing up and making his way over to his boyfriend.

"You're twenty-five minutes late," Michael whined as soon as he was close enough. "Thought you were leaving me stranded at the altar."

Now that he was closer he notices how Calum's cheeks were flushed a pretty pink colour, and how his eyes were almost completely black from the size of his pupils. His hands were even shaking a little, and looking at his hands made Michael notice how his arm veins were standing out more than usual as well. Clearly, Calum had just tossed off.

"'M sorry... was waiting for the shower water to heat up," his boyfriend lied lamely, looking down at the ground and blushing hard. It was obvious to Michael that Calum knew he was busted, and Michael decided to tease him a bit more until he'd admit it.

"Cal, princess, the showers are electric. The water is literally boiling as soon as you turn the shower on. I had one in the boys' room."

"Ours must be broken," he continued to mumble. At this point Michael was grinning widely. 

"Want me to talk to the staff about it? I'm sure someone would love to help you out if you just explained what went wrong to them."

"No!" Calum exclaimed quickly, looking up at Michael in a panic. 

And now Calum was just digging himself a deeper hole, because one of the most important rules they had was 'no lying to each other', and he was blatantly trying - and failing - to cover his ass. One of the only rules that exceeded that was the whole 'no touching yourself' one that they had been using since the beginning of their relationship. 

"No?" Michael asked with a quirked brow.

"I-um, what if I broke it? I don't want to get in trouble," he panicked.

Michael shrugged and wrapped his arm around Calum's shoulders. "You're getting punished tonight," was all he said in a causal voice, before leading them out of the hotel lobby.

* * *

It was two hours later and honestly, Michael thought that Calum had forgotten all about what would be happening when they got home. He knew that he thought wrong as soon as the hotel got back in sight from the car they were in, because Calum instantly stopped talking about his favorite part of the night and gulped audibly.

Michael simply smirked and began thanking the driver, purposefully ignoring Calum because he knew that that would work him up even more. Calum fidgeted beside him when the car came to a stop right in front of the hotel while he waited for Michael to pay the driver. He knew better than to talk at that point because it could end up with him earning himself a harsher punishment depending on how Michael was feeling.

"Thanks," Michael said cheerily, acting like he wasn't about to absolutely destroy Calum as soon as their hotel door closed behind them. "Have a good night!"

He gave the driver a tip and walked into the hotel quickly, still not looking at Calum. He stayed silent until they reached the elevator. "I'm gonna go into the boys' room and get my phone charger. When I get into our room you better be naked and kneeling, slut."

He loved the effect that his words had on his boyfriend, he relished the way he sucked in a moan at the word slut. Calum was out of the elevator and halfway down the by the time the doors had fully opened, and Michael let out a loud chuckle in case Calum could hear him because Calum loved being ridiculed, it was getting ridiculously out of hand at this point.

He walked slowly down the hallway to Ashton and Luke's room and he had to resist the urge to throw open the door to his when he passed it, simply for the reason of getting to a peak at his ethereal boyfriend. He knew that he couldn't, he knew that he would crumble if he saw his pretty boy taking his clothes off. Calum loved doing impromptu scenes like this and he wanted it to be as good as it could possibly be, so sadly he couldn't do the whole voyeur thing right now. 

He walked into the boys' room without knocking and wasn't surprised to see both of them sprawled out on the same bed with a bottle of beer in their hands and the TV playing some terrible B-rated indie horror movie.

"Sup nerds," he said loudly, making his way straight to the fridge they had. He grabbed a bottle of water instead of the tempting beer that they must have gone out and bought themselves because the ones that the hotel had been in tiny little cans.

He sat down on the bed beside them and threw the bottle cap at Ashton when they both ignored him. He needed to distract himself from the thoughts of the gorgeous boy who was currently naked by the door of their room because he wanted to have as much self-control as possible and it helped when he wasn't hard. What better way to stay soft than to hang out with Team Lashton, who were literally the most flaccid inducing people ever on days off because of how much tour exhausted them.

Michael ducked when Ashton flicked the lid back towards him, and he heard it bounce off of something. "How was your date?" Ashton asked sarcastically.

"Great, really. Well, there was this one thing-" 

"-Mikey, as much as I love your stories, Ride Along is about to come on the TV and I've been wanting to watch it all day," Luke instantly interrupted him, not even bothering to glance over at the annoyed expression on his best friends face.

"Fuck you!" Michael said indignantly, but really he was just grateful that he had an excuse to leave this soon. "By the way, it's on Netflix you idiot," were his parting words before he stood up and walked out, grabbing his charger off the coffee table on his way. Right when he was closing the door behind him he heard Luke complain. 

"You said you checked Netflix for it!"

He shook his head and walked back down a few doors until he was outside his room. He took a deep breath to help him get into character before he pushed open the heavy door as fast as he could.

He tried his hardest to keep his face as emotionless as possible, but he couldn't help how his lips twitched a bit at the sight of his naked boyfriend. He was kneeling facing the door, right beside the bed he'd claimed as his earlier that day. His cheeks were flushed a dark red colour and his dick was already standing up, Michael noted with pride. His gaze was trained steadily on the horrible off-creme colour of the carpet and his hands were behind his back, presumably linked.

Michael was happy that he could get someone this worked up. His boyfriend was fucking glowing from his position on the carpet, and there goes Michael's plan to stay flaccid. Calum was breathing heavily, and his dick twitched with interest when he heard Michael's footsteps start towards him.

Michael kept an even pace until he was directly in front of Calum, and a proud grin tugged at his lips when Calum's head stayed tilted towards the floor.  They had come so far from their first time attempting a scene, which had been an awkward mess. But no matter how many times they went through this, that didn't stop him from craving to see the beautiful coffee eyes look right at him.

"Look at me," Michael said in a neutral tone, and his heart swelled when he saw how eagerly Calum tilted his head up. Clearly Michael hadn't been the only one craving eye contact. "Do you know why you're being punished?" He could see that Calum was clearly debating whether or not he was allowed to verbally answer. 

Calum settled with nodding his head, and he carefully watched Michael's face to see if that was the right thing to do or not.

"Words."

"I'm sorry, sir," Calum said instantly. His voice was already becoming deeper again. "Yes, sir."

Michael instantly withdrew his hand and slapped Calum on the face. "Nice try, but that wasn't the answer I was looking for.  I'll say it again, and you better get it right this time. Do you know _why_ you're being punished?"

Calum was quiet for a second, before realizing what Michael meant. "I'm being punished for... for touching myself and lying about it."  

"That's more like it. So pretty when you get marked," Michael said, stroking his hand softly over the light pink hand mark on his boyfriends face. He kept it there, a small way to show that he loved Calum, and would stop as soon as he felt the need to. "Colour?"

"Green," Calum said without hesitation. 

"Alright, gorgeous," He couldn't not compliment him at that moment, and besides, Calum liked praise as well as humiliation. He loved the bite of the word slut and the kiss of the word princess. Calum keened and nuzzled slightly into Michael's hand to show that he was alright.

"That's two things that both get very serious punishments," Michael began, walking behind Calum. He reached out a hand and gently pushed between Calum's shoulder blades, loving how beautiful his boyfriend always seemed to be.

Calum's hands instantly went out in front him while he lowered his face to the ground. Michael was smiling giddily at the sight of his boyfriends beautiful ass so exposed to him. He crouched down behind him and slowly raked his nails from their spot at the top of Calum's back, all the way down to his full ass cheeks. "Great to see you can do something right. Y'know, in the car on the way back, I was wondering what I'd do with you. I _could_ not let you cum. Of course, I could also make you cum so much that you passed out," he only was saying the words for effect, but Calum was getting so into it that he let out an adorable shiver at the thought of it. "I could spank you... you'd like that, wouldn't you, you little whore? Yeah, I think I might just do that."

Okay, so maybe Michael mainly wanted to spank him because it was his and Calum's favourite form of punishment. Calum loved the harsh pain of it, and the marks left behind. Michael loved watching Calum's ass jiggle from the hits, and he also loved how pliant and desperate that it made his boyfriend.

"Bend over the bed."

Calum obediently got up and moved his arms behind his back, linking his fingers and bending over the bed. Michael went to their bag that they kept in one of Calum's suitcases and grabbed out lube, a cock ring and a vibrator. He decided that he was going to punish Calum by not letting him have his cock, which was easily Calum's favorite part of intimacy. He craved every form of physical contact, but Michael knew that a cock in his ass would satisfy him more than anything else.

 He looked fondly at the sight of Calum as he made his way over to him. 

"Hold yourself up a bit, I don't wanna hear you muffling your sounds," Michael said when he walked behind him. Calum pressed his forearms onto the bed to hold himself up a bit higher, and Michael gently kicked apart his legs to slot himself in between them.

He rubbed his palms over Calum's butt, gently massaging it. He was currently living for every noise that Calum let out, as it was fueling his already growing ego.

"How many do you think you deserve?" It was a trick question, and both of them knew it. At the end of the day, Michael was the one in charge.

"Maybe five?" Calum asked hopefully, but Michael knew that he was just trying to push him further. He was a little shit, but Michael decided to go along with it to annoy him.

"Yes, maybe only five will do it."

"Wait! I don't know, sir, only you get to decide," he frantically tried to rectify his mistake when he sensed the underlying threat in Michael's voice. 

Michael lifted his hand and let it fall down heavily onto Calum's bare arse. "That's more like it. Always such a little whore, trying to push my buttons so that you can get what you want. What are you?" He let his hand fall down again, hard.

"A whore! I'm a little slut!" Calum squealed.

"But only for me, right, princess? Only a slut for me?"

"Yes sir, it's all for you," Calum said, and Michael could tell that he was fighting the urge to turn around.

"Alright, well I think you deserve twenty," Michael said conversationally, like he wasn't about to leave his hand print all over his boyfriends backside.

Calum fidgeted slightly, and Michael knew it was because he wasn't happy with how he seemed to be getting let off the hook. That meant that Calum hadn't seen the toys he'd grabbed a few minutes ago.

He ignored him and brought his hand down, waiting patiently for Calum to count out.

"One! Thank you, sir!" He was already panting, and Michael knew that the reason Calum loved getting spanked so much was because of how much force he puts into it. Michael knew not to hold back when he was spanking, and Calum was getting so worked up from the pain alone that he feared by the end of this he might come completely untouched.

Michael bit his lip and brought his hand down on the opposite cheek, squeezing it harshly after. Calum winced when Michael's thumb rubbed over the scratches from earlier. "Two, thank you, sir."

Michael continued to rain blows down until he reached eighteen. 

"Eighteen, th-thank you, sir," Calum panted out. His face was resting sideways on the bed because he dropped from his forearms by around the fifteenth spank.

Michael knew that he was alright, if Calum wasn't completely comfortable with a situation he'd colour out, no matter how little the issue was, and it was something that assured Michael during scenes.

He reached down and hit his hand over Calum's hole twice, quick and not as hard as the other swats to avoid seriously hurting him.

Calum's legs were instantly squeezing around Michael, trying to somehow avoid the sensation. "Twenty! Thank you, sir, thank you," he babbled into the sheets, his fingers knotting together harshly.

Michael ran his nails over the cheeks again. "Glad to see you could make it through all of that. But of course you would, because you're a little painslut."

Calum nodded weakly, still panting. His cheeks were a dark red, almost the same shade as his ass, and Michael traced his fingertips lightly over the hand prints left there to tease him.

He was starting to become needy himself at this point, his palms slightly tingling still and his cock throbbing in his jeans. He stepped out from behind his boyfriend and instantly began shrugging off his clothes. He kept his boxers on because he knew if the slightest breeze touched his cock all plans of punishing Calum would go out the window and he'd end up fucking him.

He pushed Calum's legs apart gently again and knelt down in between them. "Gonna open you up now princess, you still good?"

Calum knew that answering those types of questions were the most important part of a scene, so he wasn't worried when he spoke. "Yeah, 'm fine. My shoulders a bit itchy though. The right one."

Michael was instantly reaching his hand out. "This alright?"

Calum let out a soft hum before nodding. "We can keep going now."

"Colour?"

He could practically _feel_ Calum's eye roll, but sue him for wanting to make sure that nothing would go wring.

"Green, sir."

Michael had the bottle of lube opened as soon as the words left Calum's mouth. He was so eager to see Calum's beautiful brown skin clench around his fingers. He rubbed the lube for a few seconds to make sure it wasn't too cold before slowly pushing his pointer finger in. Calum was clenched tight against it, but he relaxed after a few seconds. Michael kept his finger still until Calum was impatiently bucking back onto them. Michael let him get away with it until he managed to hit his prostate. Instantly he had his finger out and he left a quick smack on Calum's ass. "I'm in charge here, remember?" 

Calum cleared his throat. "Sorry, sir."

"That's more like it, slut."

He pushed his finger back in and didn't miss the barely audible groan that Calum let out, making his forgotten dick twitch in his underwear. He fucked his finger in slowly for a few minutes before adding a second. Calum's groan was louder this time, and Michael would never get sick of that sound. 

He let him adjust before thrusting them, purposefully avoiding Calum's prostate so that he could hear Calum's frustrated whines. Calum had started grinding against the bed and clenching around Michael's fingers out of frustration from the lack of pleasure.

"So pathetic," Michael chuckled, letting him get away with it. "Fucking gagging for it, you little slut."

Calum moaned, and Michael figured it was alright to add a third finger now. 

His boyfriend was fucking radiant at the moment. His back was covered in a thin layer of sweat and his hair was beginning to grow curlier from the heat his body was giving off, his face all scrunched up and he was panting loudly. Michael always found this part of Calum - the rawest, most vulnerable part of him - his favourite.

Calum paused when the third finger entered him, and Michael began to smirk. "You better not fucking come on my fingers you little whore."

Calum shook his head against the bed, not even being able to form words he was that far gone.

Michael began marking up Calum's thighs while he let him adjust. When he started whining and bucking back Michael knew that he was ready for the vibrator. Mainly for the fact that he liked seeing Calum so desperate for more, always more.

His hands were twitching behind his back and it was clear that he wanted to reach out and put them on something, anything at all. But he was a good boy and kept them there, settling for grasping his wrists tightly.

He knew not to rut down because he had just been reprimanded over it, so he was trying to reach his reach his prostate because he figured he was allowed to when Michael hadn't made any move to stop him.

When Michael was shook out of his trance, he reached out and put a hand on Calum's lower back, a simple gesture that Calum knew all too well would lead to punishment if it wasn't obeyed. He instantly stopped, and Michael could hear his heavy breathing. He focused on a single bead of sweat rolling from Calum's shoulder blade to calm himself down and not just slip his dick straight into him.

Slowly, he slid his fingers out and couldn't help but chuckle at how Calum clamped slightly around him to keep the feeling of being full. He glanced jealously at the vibrator on the bed, and it was ridiculous, really, how he was jealous of an inanimate object that he himself was in control over, but for the sake of pleasing his boyfriend he knew that he needed to continue the punishment, and fucking into him now would just be too easy.

Calum's breath hitched in his throat when he felt the toy press against his hole, and whined because it wasn't his boyfriend's dick which he had been craving all fucking night. Michael wanted to laugh at how cute his boyfriend was, he wanted to pinch his cheeks at how obviously he wanted him inside his pert little ass, and his chest swelled with pride at the sense of want that was being emanated off of Calum with every breath of air he released, every bead of sweat that was rolling down him, the heat of his spanked ass, the desperate clenching he was doing around the skinny vibrator that was only just long enough to reach his prostate if pressure was put against it.

Michael slowly raised the setting, enjoying the frustrated groans when the toy was just _that_ far away from that special spot and he could practically taste how good it would feel, but he knew that Michael was committed to the scene and wouldn't let it touch his prostate unless he wanted to. He grabbed the cock ring and ignored Calum's weak whimper of protest, only stopping to ask his colour once it was slid on.

"Green," Calum managed to pant out.

"Look at you," Michael began, uncapping the lube and slowly rubbing it into the insides of Calum's thighs, just in between the pretty galaxy he had left earlier. "You're gagging for it. You've got a vibrator in your pretty little arse, but even that isn't enough for you, is it, slut?"

"No, sir," Calum panted.

"And why is that?"

"N-not big enough. Doesn't fill me like your cock does. Not long enough, not-not thick enough," Calum rambled, barely able to understand what he's saying because he was feeling dizzily needy at the moment but knowing that he needed to answer.

"Hm, I think that's a bit selfish. If we were in a room with the other two, I'm sure you'd love to have their cocks in you just the same. Doesn't matter how big they were, because you're just a little cockslut who isn't happy unless they have something warm and leaking inside them"

"Please, Sir, I need-" he broke off to let out a loud whine when Michael ran his knuckles along the underside of Calum's cock.

"Well, it's a shame that you need something, Cal. Because right now I want nothing more than to slip my cock between your thighs while you cry because of the overwhelming need to come, but you just _can't_."

Calum let out a light sob but spread himself out before Michael even needed to ask his colour. He loved when everything was right on the verge of too much, and trusted Michael to not let him fall over the edge.

Michael wiped his hand on the hotel sheets, even though they would probably still end up messy by the end and kicked off his boxers. He leaned forwards and his cock slid between Calum's slippery thighs, and the pressure after this long felt amazing.

His cock brushed against Calum's, resulting in a hyper sensitive whine from the latter and a breathy laugh from the former. He thrust sporadically, knowing that he'd need to come fast because Calum couldn't stay like that all night, and also because his dick was fucking _hurting_ from the lack of stimulation at this point.

Calum tried to angle himself so that very thrust would drag Michael's cock against his, and so that Michael would be able to push the vibrator in deeper to touch his prostate as well. It wasn't working out very well though because of how slippy everything was, so he gave up after a few minutes.

"Face down," Michael panted out, pushing between Calum's shoulder blades. Everything was so good and he wanted nothing more than to rip the tiny toy out of him and to thrust himself in, but he couldn't, because he was supposed to be cool, calm and collected, he had to exude self control, because that's the type of thing that Calum fed off during sex.

Calum's thighs were making Michael feel dizzy with pleasure, and the lube was getting everywhere but neither of them really cared at that moment, both of them trying to chase their pleasure but knowing only Michael would be getting it right then.

He started to get closer, feeling the heat begin to pool in his tummy, so he began moving even faster. He wanted to paint his pretty boyfriend's back with his cum, to mark him as his.

"S-so close," Michael breathed. "I'm gonna come all over you, slut, and you're gonna love it, aren't you?"

"Yes, sir, please, come all over me, make me yours," Calum said, and then he let out a high pitched whine when the vibrator was shoved in a bit more. "Please, I need it."

And his begging voice was just _so_ perfect that Michael was instantly pulling away from his thighs and stroking himself quickly. He barely touched himself when he was coming with a loud groan, most of it pooling on Calum's lower back but some making it up to his shoulders.

Michael was panting, and his thighs were shaking, but he knew that he had to get Calum comfortable. "So perfect, baby," he smiled, kissing where his thigh met his butt while he pulled out the vibrator. 

Calum could only whine, so desperate to come.

"Love you so much, my pretty little princess," Michael praised, wiping off Calum's back with his shirt that was on the floor. He softly rolled him onto his now clean back and smiled up at him from between his thighs. "Always so good for me."

He slowly rolled the ring off his dick, wincing slightly at how red and sore looking it was. Precome was beading at the tip and Calum smiled weakly down at Michael.

"My beautiful boy," Michael muttered, kissing his hips on either side of his cock. "Wanna come, princess? Want me to make you come?"

"Please, Mikey," Calum mumbled, and Michael knew not to scold him because the scene had been over as soon as the praise had left his mouth. He knew Calum's limits, and if he had let it go on much longer something bad could have happened.

Michael smiled and kissed his hips one last time before slowly reaching out and wrapping his hand around Calum's cock. He was oversensitive from needing to come for so long, and his hips were instantly bucking up to chase the pleasure. He was keening, his face doing the adorable thing it does where it goes all squishy looking, and if he were to look down at Michael he'd be able to read the word FOND in his eyes.

After a few seconds when Calum had relaxed he leaned over and let his tongue lick a stripe from the base to his tip, moaning at the taste of precome. Calum's hands were fisting the sheets so tightly that Michael was almost worried that they'd get torn. 

He didn't waste time teasing him, knowing that his baby needed to come and _now_. He sucked the tip in and his lips curled up slightly at the quiet "holy shit" that Calum let out. He looked back up and saw him looking straight back at him with a dazed out expression.

He could tell Calum was close by how his eyebrows were knitted so close together and how the moans were gradually becoming more and more high pitched. He pulled off and began slowly jacking him off so that he could talk Calum through it all.

"You gonna come, baby boy? You did so, so well for me. I'm so proud of you, princess."

Calum suddenly was arching his back and coming, letting out the pretty noises that Michael loved to hear so much.

"Did so good babe. So perfect for me. I love you so much," Michael said in a clear voice, showering Calum's face in kisses.

Calum giggled cutely and shoved Michael's face away gently.

"Love you Calum. Love you so much. You're amazing, princess. Love you so, so much," Michael mumbled, nuzzling his face into Calum's throat. His hair was tickling Calum's nose, and their sweaty skin was sticking together, but right then and there Calum was content. Michael gently cleaned Calum up with the same shirt, grimacing and throwing it in the general direction of the bathroom.

"Love you too, Mikey," he said in the middle of a yawn.

"Wanna go to sleep?" Michael was instantly asking him, making him let out a wide grin. Sometimes it blew Calum away how caring Michael was to him.

"No, don't wanna sleep," he grunted before pushing himself up onto his elbows. "We're on a date, remember? Let's watch a movie or something."

"Excuse me, I just fucked the shit out of you," Michael said indignantly, and probably a bit too loud, "well, kind of."

"And they say romance is dead," Calum teased. He winced when he went to sit up all the way, and instantly Michael was pausing him by putting his hands on his shoulders.

"I'll put you into the other bed and you can pick a movie while I get some things," Michael said, and Calum was smiling again.

Michael carefully put Calum across his shoulders and carried him fireman style to his clean bed. He kissed Calum on the nose before leaving the bedroom area.

He found one of his shirts and a pair of Cal's boxers and put them in the dryer for a few minutes to heat them up while he made some hot chocolate for the two of them. He grabbed a towel and wetted it before bringing everything back into the room.

He frowned when he saw that Calum wasn't on the bed where he left him. "Cal, baby?"

"In the bathroom!"

Michael rolled his eyes, of course the bitch would get in the shower without offering to share it. or at least letting Michael help. He put down the drinks and the towel and brought the clothes into the bathroom with him. He walked in right as Calum was reaching for the bottle of shampoo.

"I'll do it for you, princess," Michael offered when he noticed how Calum was struggling to stand up. In a kind of fucked up way, he felt proud, because it was him that made Calum act like this. He was the reason that Calum's ass was an obscene shade of red, and why his legs were still slightly shaking while he attempted to stand.

"Yes, I know it was you did it, you fucktard," Calum chuckled while he handed Michael his favourite shampoo.

"Didn't realize I said it out loud," Michael mumbled sheepishly, making Calum laugh even louder. "Shut up and sit down!"

"You're such a five year old," Calum said after he managed to sit down in the tub with his back facing Michael, flinching slightly at the cold and the harsh pressure against his probably bruising ass.

"I just rawed you! I demand respect!"

"I hate you, oh my God."

Michael decided to ignore that while he reached for the shower head. "Hold this for me, and if you splash me I will not hesitate to drown you."

Calum tilted his head back to look at Michael, a dopey grin on his face.

"Stop looking back at me like that or I'll pour shampoo in your eyes," Michael threatened calmly while he lathered his hands with it.

"I love you too, babe."

Michael rolled his eyes but still couldn't help but mumble "I love you" back. He gave the top of Calum's wet hair a kiss before he began slowly massaging shampoo into Calum's hair.

"You were so great," Michael mumbled while he continued rubbing Calum's head. "I love you so much. Wanna do this all the time."

"What, bathe me?"

"Boy don't test me."

"You're such a nerd," Calum chuckled.

"Shut up and give me the shower head," Michael grumbled.

He used one hand to hold the hose and with the other he continued gently combing his fingers through Calum's soapy hair, slowly rinsing it off.

"I know what you meant," Calum chimed in after a few minutes.

"Huh?" Michael asked while his hand reached for the conditioner.

"I wanna do this all the time."

Michael stopped altogether, and he had a massive grin on his face. Calum turned to see why Michael had suddenly stopped everything. "Calum Thomas Hood, did you just say something mildly romantic instead of teasing my aftercare?"

"Don't get used to it," Calum smiled before leaning over and kissing Michael gently. He grabbed the conditioner and handed it to Michael. While he poured some out, he continued, "We don't really get time to ourselves, y'know? I miss when we weren't as busy, when we could do stuff like this all the time."

"Getting romantically rawed?"

"I hate you."

Michael stopped conditioning Calum's hair and rinsed his hands, ready to leave it set. "I know what you mean, babe. Sometimes it feels like every time we walk into our room, Luke is gonna be lurking there."

"That's because he usually is," Calum groaned. "And when you kick him out he puts socks and signs on the door so everyone in the hotel knows we're fucking."

"He's a vindictive little fuck," Michael chuckled. "Hose."

Calum handed him the hose. "Hurry up, Ride Along is starting in like two minutes."

Michael smiled slightly when he remembered Luke talking about it earlier.

"Don't rush perfection unless you want to look like your normal self," Michael teased, but he did rinse his hair out faster this time. "Stand up- _carefully_ , babe," he said when he saw Calum wincing again. "I heated some clothes for you, and there's some hot chocolate in the room. I'll be out in a second."

He couldn't help the fond grin he had when he saw Calum waddle out of the room in a towel that was probably triple the size of him. He had a quick body wash and walked out to see his boyfriend lying on his stomach in only his shirt.

He winced when he saw how red Calum's ass was. "Babe, where'd we leave the cream?"

"My bag, somewhere in the sock part," Calum mumbled, already engrossed in the film on the TV.

Michael quickly walked over to the corner where their bags were and fished out the small tub and Cal's loosest sweats.

Calum didn't even flinch when Michael straddled his thighs, only showing a sign of life when Michael pressed the cold cream against his still sore ass.

"Shit! Sorry, I forgot to rub my hands together to heat it up," Michael said guiltily when he saw Calum jump. He continued rubbing it in for a few minutes before getting off and laying next to him. He was perfectly content in moments like these, just him and his nerdy boyfriend.

**Author's Note:**

> GUYS IM ALIVE
> 
> ok so ik i should be updating siflhth but i wanted to do a malum fic and caN I JUST SAY A BIG THANK YOU TO ABBY FOR PUTTING UP WITH ME SAYING I WAS GONNA WRITE FOR THE PAST LIKE TWO MONTHS AND TRACEE FOR NOT GETTING ANNOYED BY HOW MUCH I MENTIONED WRITING THIS AND THEN ABANDONING IT AND PROCRASTINATING
> 
> *wipes sweat*
> 
> this didnt even turn out as well as i was hoping yikes i flopped tryna do mikeys pov im sry
> 
> anYway hmu :D
> 
> tumblr: shitpostmichael ((sadly this url sums me up way too well))  
> wattpad: driftwood-luke  
> kik: idk.kelsey


End file.
